Monday, September 18, 2006

Oh behave!

by teresa

Last Monday, after a week of back to school chaos (attitudes about homework,fighting going to bed earlier,fighting getting up earlier,etc) I decided to create a behavior/expectation chart for the kids. It looks like a calendar week...with blank bubbles to the left to fill in with things the kids need to work on. Then at the bottom it says....if I get ___ points this week...I get to do___. I figured it would be met with ridicule and disbelief. You know how kids are...."that's stupid"...I don't have to do this"..."why do I have to do this junk everyday"!! They dillydallied at the beginning of the week...missing points...not believing I would follow though and hold back their rewards(Lauren had picked going out with friends, Nick had picked going over his nanny Jackie's and Ben had picked playing with Kai). Chris and I got aggravated about missed chores at the beginning of last week...but I kept saying..."I know it will pay off by next week"! The point of the chart was to keep us from having to bug them about every little thing. It left it all on them...not us. No nagging...no fighting about messy rooms and attitudes. Just blank spaces...no points...boring weekends just waiting for them. On Saturday morning the boys were still shy 3 points...so they got up early and cleaned out the garage and mowed the yard...read and then even did extra homework I printed off the internet. They had got the message...it was at the last minute...but they pulled it through in the end. But Lauren didn't take me seriously at all. She didn't even get half her points. But once the weekend rolled around...and her butt was sitting here with me every minute...I think she got the picture. It's not like I have anything unreasonable on the chart. Actually...it's just the things they are EXPECTED to do to be a part of this house. They were just getting slack and needed a little push to help get them back on track. Like Lauren's has stuff like....kept room clean, kept car clean,did homework,was nice (openly)to brother,read for 30 minutes. Nick's says...homework,read 30 minutes,nice to brother,mowed yard,took shower,etc. Ben's has stuff like...got up in good mood,did homework with no attitude, read 30 minutes, listened at soccer practice(he has acted up terrible with us coaching this time),went to bed without getting up,etc.
Well...as of tonight....the kids each have at least 3 points each (the boys have 4 each). I think it's working...I think it's working...I think it's working! Sssshhhhhh...don't let them hear us discussing it, rejoicing in my brilliance or they'll misbehave just to spite me...just to make me look like I don't know what I'm doing.

3 comments:

Zephra said...

I am glad it is working. I tried a chart over the summer and it was a bit of a help but our house is so sporatic that I am to blame some of the time if their chores are not done. When school is in session Kamran is limited on his time so he gets out of a lot.

Anonymous said...

If I don't get any points this week, can I be grounded to my room for the weekend?

We started giving Ethan an allowance (10 cents a week, big spender that I am!) if he gets a star in each of the spots on his chore chart. All he has to do is dust and vacuum the living room, empty the bathroom garbages, and pick up his toys each night. He gets the biggest kick out of putting stars on his chart every day that he nags me to death until I finally get around to getting his duster and vacuum for him!

Anonymous said...

Melissa . . . haven't you heard of the minimum wage law? Now that's what I call cheap labor. But I guess when you add in all of the fringe benefits (food, clothing, shelter), it's not really cheap.