Thursday, October 30, 2008

The good, the bad and the ugly

by teresa

Mommy's day out...

I went to the bank and picked the fastest line at the drive through.
It was awesome.

I almost assaulted a cashier at Old Navy.
(don't you hate it when they don't give you the discount marked? "The system rings it at $$$, so that's the price." Well what about the had written sign above the pants you moron??! I ended up being proved right by the manager and was offered them at the price I requested. The bratty, size 0, twenty something cashier wearing too much eye liner was embarrassed. Once the manager walked away, I handed them back to "little miss can't be wrong" and told her I would rather lick a homeless man's toes than buy these pants from her now. (or maybe I just gave her my condescending smile and said,"no thank you sweetie....I changed my mind".)

I watched a man being pulled over by the police, drive up into a Wendy's drive in, like he was going to be allowed to order a double stack while getting a ticket. The cop didn't look happy.

I lost my keys for ten minutes before I realized I had been sitting on them the whole time.
I don't know which is more depressing. Being so senile that I forgot two seconds ago I layed my keys in my car seat to reach back and get my sunglasses. Or the fact that I sat on a huge set of keys and I have so much "junk in my trunk" that I didn't even feel it.

Actual questions and comments heard in the Green house this week

by teresa

I think I have a man crush on him.

I almost woke you at 4:00am.

She is so thuggalicious.

Do NOT change the channel, I am watching Charlie Brown!

I am really out of shape. Is it okay to be having chest pains after playing basketball with your son for ten minutes?

I got to school and noticed I had a booger on my pants leg.

I know I said ten minutes...but I changed my mind. My leg is getting a cramp.

I love Abraham Lincoln!

I am going to the Haunted Forest.

Where is that?

In her room.

Doesn't your son's lipstick look pretty?

I couldn't find the chapstick, so I gave him his sisters burts bees lip shimmer. It was dark in the room, so he didn't even notice. Don't let me forget to take it from him and switch it out before he goes to school tomorrow.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

My house smells like hot apple cider...and it's not even a Glade candle.

by teresa

It is so cold outside it makes me want to carve a pumpkin and wear a funky striped scarf. Maybe even buy something corduroy.
I woke up, saw my breath and thought one thing.
Beef stew.
It is a perfect beef stew kinda day.
So after the kids were off to school I started peeling taters and chopping meat and veggies. I tossed it all in the crock pot and can't wait to enjoy it with the family before Ben's frigid soccer practice tonight.

I also saw a yummy spiced apple and pear crumble recipe over at bread & honey and just had to make it too.

It will hit the spot when we get into our warm jammies tonight and cuddle on the couch before bed. I gave it a little taste (just to check the doneness) when it came hot out of the oven and ohhh my. It's like a big hug for your tummy.

Monday, October 27, 2008

We need a game that gives points for the cleanest room, how many times you've told your mommy you love her and everytime you are nice to a sibling

by teresa

Ben has a new obsession.
No, not video games, webkins or pokemon cards.
The kid is all about math.
Two weeks ago Ben whined about math homework.
Why, the 180 you ask.
Because his school made it a contest.
They gave them all passwords to
There are different levels of difficulty and you get "sticker" points for every exercise you complete correctly.
And they list the students rankings online.
This really hooked him.
"Mom, Keshawn is ahead of me...can I stay up 30 more minutes to do some division?"
Who hears that from their kid?
As of this morning (after he spent every free moment on it this weekend AND got up early this morning to do more problems) he is ranked #11 in his entire school (4th and 5th graders included).
I want to find the genius who created this game and give them a big hug.

Saturday, October 25, 2008

We have three years to look for a person who does reese cup sculptures

by teresa

Yesterday, on the way to school, Nick told me about a dream he had last night.
He prefaced the story with one word..."amazing".

Here's the conversation:

Mom, I dreamt it was my 16th birthday.
You guys threw me a huge party that everybody I ever knew came to.
We had those big lights outside (like at car dealerships) shining in the sky for people to find us.
It was set up in the gym at church and there were colored spot lights rotating across the room and ceiling.
The music was loud and I was having a great time.
There was a big statue of me made entirely of reese cups.
And then right before I took a bite of the woke me up to get in the shower.

Why mom?
Why did you have to wake me before I tasted the cake?

Some men see things as they are and say, "Why?" I dream of things that never were and say, "Why not?"
-George Bernerd Shaw

Friday, October 24, 2008

the votes are in...

by teresa

At Ben's school the mock election votes were tallied and....
McCain /Palin won.
Ben was bummed.
Apparently he (and a scant few) voted Obama/Biden.
I asked him why he chose Obama and he said, "he will make the war stop, he is black (and it would be cool to have a black president), and he will erase taxes."
Erase taxes?
Maybe I need to rethink my choice!

Nick's school had mock elections too.
Nick decided on a write in candidate...his english teacher Mr. Pardue.
What a dork.

All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his. ~Oscar Wilde

As I sit here, eleven days before the election, I was thinking. Isn't it cool that mothers have so quickly taken the center stage. In the past, the only time politicians spoke of moms was when they were bashing welfare moms, as if they might bring down the entire country. Now mothering is equated with the experience needed to run the country.
All of a sudden mommies have been launched into the limelight. All of us. SAHM's, working moms, hockey (soccer) moms and teenage moms.
I will not share my opinions on either candidate here.
I just thought it was cool that us moms were getting so much positive attention.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

All television is educational television. The question is: what is it teaching?

by teresa

We love our dvr.
What did we do before we could "tape" all our shows?
Now we watch what we want, when we want.
There is only one problem I can think of.
Our dvr can only handle so much at one time and with five people wanting to record five different things at the same time, sometimes you have to get creative.
So what I do is scan through the guide and see when shows are repeating. I bet you didn't know that most shows re-air from like 1:00am to 4:00am? So I record things real time and other things over night. Here's the dilemma. Prime time shows have commercials like Visit Disneyland, Kraft Macaroni & Cheese, Skittles...Taste the Rainbow and Ford.
Not the same at 2:00am.
So when your son sits down to watch the MythBusters you recorded for him, you may want to be nearby to answer his questions about why that pretty girl Jenny has her phone number on tv (1-800-floozy) for you to call and be her friend. Or why his school doesn't teach "the healing art of touch" massage techniques. And then he knocks ten years off your life by asking,"mom, do most girls get their *blank* pierced?

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Actual questions and comments heard in the Green house this week

by teresa

You're acting weird this morning.
How can you tell?

It's not good to be trapped in a room full of people when you have gas this bad. Maybe I can blame it on the kids.

I am going to ride by the house, run out to the car and spray me with perfume.

Why are you dressed like that?
It's mix-match day.
Was yesterday nerd day?
No, why?
No reason...I was just asking.

Mom, we had our elections in school today and I voted democracy!

Are we allowed to watch the Monday shows without you?

This game is straight outta the Bad News Bears!

Could you please stop snoring, or I may have to smother you in your sleep!

Mom told the new lady at her work that she has a dog (or granddaughter) that she can have to keep her from being lonely.

I want a little runabout town kinda car. I'm sick of this gas gusslin' mom-mobile.

I thought I was getting really sick...but now I think it was just the tacos, cake, peanuts and pickles I ate before I went to bed.

Mom! Mom! Come look...there's a blimp in our backyard!

Let's not cover the pool. That way we can use it during the winter to punish the kids.

Mom, I love you. You're the best mom I have.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Our weekend

by teresa

band parents
high school football
wet hair
drenching rain
baseball game
shoes ruined in puddle
cheering competition
locked keys in car
little league football game
numb noses and ears
birthday party
forgot the gift
tummy ache from too much cake and tacos
fourth grade project
left kid alone and took nap
woke to glitter,glue,sharpies and stickers on carpet
up till 2:00am catching up on laundry
up at 6:00am looking for lost keys

*A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.

Friday, October 17, 2008

One . . . more . . . . day . . . .

By Chris

Man . . . this daily bloggin' duty is hard. How does she always find something to say? This post should get me fired for a while, because it will be the most random nonsense ever written here.

  • Sarah Palin needs a new speech. She does the opposite of grow on you, I think. Love her at first, then . . . not so much.
  • Three letter word: J-O-B-S. hehehe (That was Biden, BTW).
  • It's very lame, but for people who had no DVR a year ago, we now think we may need two. On too many occasions, we're running out of space and wanting to record too many things simultaneously. Like I said . . . Lame.
  • Nephew Kai hit his first real HOMERUN last night, and that was more exciting than anything we DVR'ed. I was the only one there to see it, so the legend of the night is all mine to exaggerate and brag about forever. Knowing my weak spot, he immediately began negotiating for a deposit into the Bank of Dad for his accomplishment.
  • Speaking of Kai, he has a good buddy who is a girl. She's a tomboy and right up his ally. On the ride home last night, he confides in me that he would like it if she could be "half friend and half girlfriend." Amen, nephew.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

News and Politics

By Chris

Strange as it may seem, Ben and Nick are into news and politics. Ben, especially, likes to watch the debates and any news about McCain vs. Obama. Nick scans the news pretty regularly, and he seems to be into the economic news coverage. He keeps score with me on the stock market's ups and downs. It's confusing to him . . . these are the kind of questions he's asked lately: "if the government prints money, how can they be in financial trouble?" "Did they pass the bailout? What does it mean?" Wow. The birds and the bees talk is easier than this stuff with a 13-year-old! Ben, meanwhile, asks questions like "I heard Obama will add an hour to every school day?" What!? There's false propaganda, even in elementrary school? That's tamer than what adults spread about both candidates, but still . . . it's sort of revealing. Ben's going to vote in his school's election, and he's been trying to make up his mind; and we've been letting him. It's not easy to tell him where to get information. There are not really many places a kid, or adult, can find real, factual reporting today. We've discovered there's more news and less information. One station is spewing talking points A. The other, talking points B. And so on. He told me during last night's debate, that he had decided. Hint: His candidate is a Senator ;))

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Your barn door is open

by teresa

I took off my under clothes today...and a bubble gum wrapper fell out.
From where...I don't know?

The weird thing is...I haven't even chewed any gum recently.

I have a question for you.
Do you tell strangers when they have something on them, inside out, unzipped or holey?
I always tell.
I have been in this situation several times lately.
A man in front of me had on new pants with the size sticker still on his back leg. A woman in a store with her shirt inside out and a mommy (toting two toddlers) with her blouse unbuttoned.
I would hope someone would do the same for me.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

On Duty

By Chris

Reporting for blogging duty as assigned. This is really hard to do on-demand . . . instead of when something hits me every three months. It'll be a lot more random until bloggin momma gets back here...

It was strange ... and sort of nice . . . to not have soccer this weekend. Boy, have we done a lot of soccer! We took in the high school football homecoming activities. It's where Teresa and I went to h.s., and where our kids go \ will go. Nick was checking out the band pretty good. They have a blast playing cool songs in the stands and dancing during the game. He'll be in that band next year at this time. He's pretty naturally gifted musically, and it's his kind of crew too. Next week, he gets to play the National Anthem on the field before the big Friday night game with the big kids. He's excited. We're excited.

Book Fair vs. Soccer
Tonight presented an interesting struggle. Teresa is big cheese of the book fair at Ben's school. The major event is a family dinner \ program \ book shopping night tonight. As always, Teresa goes all out if she's in charge of something. Especially when it has to do with books and kids, her two favorite things (along with old people). She networked, promoted and prayed all over it to get a big crowd. But, Tuesday night is soccer practice. You see where this is going! I stayed out of it. The pressure eased a bit when more than 400 rsvp's were secured for the book night. We wouldn't put a dent in her crowd, so B will get to practice, then catch the end of the book event. And, I'll get to miss eating chili at school that came from Lord only knows where. Ben doesn't really need book night, because any kid of Teresa's has enough access to books to last a lifetime, and is made to read mucho often. Ben, of course, complies because they keep score on such things, and he is mortified if he is not on every best-of list that anyone keeps.

Monday, October 13, 2008

Say no Teresa....just say NO!

by teresa

This is day one of the bookfair at Ben's school.
You guys know it's my favorite time of year.
I have always enjoyed volunteering when ever bookfairs come around.
Until now.
This year is a bit different.
I am now IN CHARGE of the bookfair.
"In charge" is work...not fun.
Who knew there was so much to being the coordinator.

Since I will be living there this week I am asking that Chris do some of the blog lifting this week.
Come on honey....let's hear what ya gotta say.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

I am not invisible...HE see's everything I do.

by teresa

Last night was book club. What a joyful time we had. The book discussion was so interesting, with different interpretations and views. But the love, peace, friendship and renewing of mind and spirit was felt the same by all. It is something I look forward to more than anything I can think of. If I miss it....I have missed a chance to recharge my batteries for another month of power parenting and espousing. A chance to be a woman with no strings attached (pleasing, cooking, cleaning, devoting). Time to laugh (alot), hug and chit chat. As a mom and wife can you think of anything better than that?

“Rest when you're weary. Refresh and renew yourself, your body, your mind, your spirit. Then get back to work.”
Ralph Marston

All moms click here to find out the reason we do it all.

Friday, October 10, 2008

I am officially banning television viewing in my house(unless it's on Paula Deen or jon & kate).

by teresa

I am sick of hearing about the economy.
Aren't you?
It is what it is.
Enough with the media alerts and warnings.
CNN is NOT who we should be consulting.
After all, this current crisis should remind us that we are stewards. Everything we are, do, and own belongs to God and is to be at the disposal of Kingdom purposes. This world is not our home and our treasure is not found here. We are to do all, invest all, own all and purchase all to the glory of God.

I am sick of hearing about the election.
Aren't you?
Blah blah blabbity blah.
Pray and vote...that's all I have to say about that.

Thursday, October 09, 2008

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Actual questions and comments heard in the Green house this week

by teresa

I am cutting down on my fartohydrates.

When people sing to the music I'm playing it makes me smile.

I pulled up and saw her bed by the house and got so happy.

Where am I supposed to sleep tonight?

That's what Ben will look like in 50 years.

Let's park by the laundromat and spy on her through the window.

That woman is ralking...running and walking at the same time.

I go to the left and my butt goes to the right.

All you gotta do is push play, do you think you can handle that?

I think Mr. Tumnus was flirting with me.

What is Mr. Tumnus?

He's a satyr.

What the heck is a satyr?

Half man, half goat.

It is very disturbing that you know these things.

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

I never liked Charlotte's Web

by teresa

I just went to climb in the shower and a spider had hatched in there.
Hundreds of baby spiders all over the place.

I'm going back to bed.

Monday, October 06, 2008

raise your hand if you're sure!

by teresa

What a great weekend.
Kai's team won (11 to 10) off his slams and rbi's.
It was very exciting.
Ben's team continued their winning streak with an awesome win over their Smithfield opponents (5 to 2). Ben scored a pretty goal in the second half.
I would put up a great picture....but my picasa is being grumpy this morning.

On the way to the soccer game Saturday, Ben and I stopped by the library. We were a little early and usually don't go out to that part of town, where our main library branch is located. It is huge (3 stories) and super nice. The parking lot was packed, so I assumed there must be a big event going on. We walked up and the automatic doors whoosed open (cool). That's when the foulest, most intense level of body odor hit us in the face. Ben was all,"ewww mom, what is that smell?" I scanned the lobby and new instantly where the offensive aromas were coming from. Nerds. don't take me the wrong way. I love nerds, I have wonderful nerds in my immediate family, I may even be a nerd from time to time. But I'm talking about 4oyr old, living in my mom's basement, your 1995 Toyota corolla has a bumper sticker that other car is a time machine, kind of nerd. Apparently Ben and I walked smack dab in the middle of Monsterfest 2008. There were tables and booths set up everywhere. Selling monster comics/movies and books, fortune tellers, alien photos and even real live ghost hunters. And the best part is all the people were poured into (more like busting out of) werewolf, vampire, monkey men and alien costumes. That's why it smelled so bad in there. The latex costumes, combined with the aversion to showering was a lethal combination. I soooo wish I had brought my camera in with me. But I did jot down a few of my favorite license plates and bumper stickers on the way out.

1. I brake for Leprechauns
2. I'm paranormal
3. 757-ghostbusters
4. Dr. Madblood rocks my Saturday nights!
5. 4spirits
6. Devo is #1

Saturday, October 04, 2008

busy saturdays make me happy

by teresa

We were all (well, everyone except lauren) up at the crack getting our chores done early. I did four tubs of laundry, cleaned the kitchen, cleaned out the garage with Ben and helped Nick get started on the yardwork. Chris was up and out to attend Making Strides. I think I'll leave Lauren a little list do do the rest of the cleaning in the house. Won't that be a nice way to wake up on a Saturday morning?
After my shower, we are off to baseball and soccer games for the rest of the day.
If anyone wants to join us, we will be at the tcc (in chesapeake) fields at 2:15.
Go Monarchs!

Thursday, October 02, 2008

Step on the scale

by teresa

It's been a bit boring around here this week. Lots of rain, canceling a soccer practice and a baseball game. Just kinda stuck at home doing nothing most nights. It did forced me to clean out mine and the boys closets though, so I guess that's good. Tonight we are back on for soccer practice and a high school football game. It will be in the low 60's, which is perfect football watching weather. Today I have to run by Nick's school and drop off some PTA stuff and then head back over for day three (and the final day) of helping the nurse at Ben's school. She is required to record the height and weight of every student in the school (close to 500 kids). I remember this as a child. Our P.E. teacher did it in front of the whole class. How humiliating. My first day there we had a girl hide in the bathroom to avoid having this done. I felt so bad for her. I know how she feels, cause if someone required the same of me now I would poke them in the eye and run. I asked the nurse what is her purpose in doing this. She told me it is a state mandate, she HAS to do it. I asked her what would happen if someone refused. She said,"it is done in private (there is a curtain drawn behind each child) one but us knows the there is no reason not to do it." They use the results to track overweight children through the years. they check their blood pressure and keep a close eye on them. I feel like this is a parents job. If I got a call from school that my kid was overweight, I would be a bit irked. I would just hate for some kids to get stressed out at school about having this done. A boy cried yesterday. The chubby girls linger in the back of the line, trying to be last. And by the way, there is no such thing as "private" when you're in a tiny room with 20 kids. They are trying to peek a look at your chart, listen to us whisper results to each other, they yell out if they think they heard you say 100-something. Good grief. It's not just about the weights either. The short boys were being taunted about heights too.

What are your thoughts on this? Should schools require this? What would you do if your child said "no".

Wednesday, October 01, 2008